


The (Almost Fair) Trials of Sirius Black

by NancyHartigan



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, Likely To End Up A Longfic, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-First War with Voldemort, Sirius Black Raises Harry Potter, Survivor Guilt, Vignette
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:54:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 9,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22315138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NancyHartigan/pseuds/NancyHartigan
Summary: November 1981. As the Wizarding World is finally looking up after the death of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, they failed to turn their eyes to the last remaining Marauder in good standing. While they rounded up the last remaining Death Eaters and cried out for justice, he did not ask for anything but time to himself to take the shredded pieces of his life and try to sew them into something that made sense.It made a perfect hideout for a dangerous refugee to try to just think and do what was right by his godson, but with the trust broken and secrets thick in the air, it was hard to tell what the right thing to do could possibly be. At least this time around, Sirius has Harry on the line, and when it comes to Harry, Sirius has never been known to play fair -- sometimes you had to play a little dirty to get on even footing with the Ministry, anyway.This is a series of vignettes following the almost fair trials of Sirius Black, where the judge, juries, and executioners are the public, the Ministry, and even more heartbreaking to him, the last man standing that Sirius thought he could trust.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 30





	1. All Hallow's Eve

**Author's Note:**

> As I mentioned in the notes of JPatFLP, I've been doing some vignettes in a pretty common AU concept (wherein WolfStar raise Harry). I thought I'd go ahead and post every so often.
> 
> Little known fact though, and here comes the twist: I'm a paralegal by trade. American, sure enough, but I do know how to and casually research case law in other countries, and to literally nobody's surprise, I can comfortably say that Sirius' trial violated his rights as a British citizen (Barty Crouch Jr.'s trial was a hot mess in itself, but let's not get me started on that!) and I figured it might be fun to see how it would have played out if that wasn't the case. Since court procedural is a genre that might not appeal to everybody, though, and I did find it a little easier to write more of the "trials" going on at home than at the Ministry, so I just kind of lumped them all together in one big file and there you go! :)
> 
> That being said, I'm not a lawyer, my specialization is in a civil matter and not criminal, and the interpretation of laws on a case-by-case basis is not something that I am allowed to do. Add that to the fact that I am going to have to go off of what we know in the Wizarding World on top of my limited British law, I'm going to take my creative license for what qualifies as a fair trial for a wizard and RUN WITH IT.
> 
> Okay, boring stuff and mini-rant over. Let's get on to the fun stuff! See you guys in the comments!

Time had long started to stand still for Sirius Black on the thirty-first night of October, starting with seeing rubble where the house of his best friend, James Potter once stood. He could barely breathe, he could hardly think straight, but somehow, he had managed to keep himself cool and collected on the outside, at least until he realized that the familiar sound of crying was reaching his ears and he joined the large man digging through the rubble just so that he could get a look at the source.

It was by far the worst night of his life, and even though he was fresh from the fight with Peter, where the bastard had doomed him to rot in Azkaban for the rest of his days if he could be caught, those cries alleviated some of that pain. He wrapped his arms around the toddler, gingerly at first, and just started to rock him, his grip slowly becoming tighter as he became more confident in Harry’s strength, never wanting to let go of him.

He dared not dig much further in; he didn’t want to see a shock of red hair and the sight of a pair of broken glasses would likely bring him to his knees long enough to be caught. No, what mattered was the screams and the sniffles that were filling his right ear, threatening to deafen him.

“Got orders from Dumbledore te take ‘im to his aunt’s,” his digging partner told him. “Should be safe there.”

Sirius froze, still holding Harry tightly, afraid to let go. “I’m his godfather,” he explained. “Lily and James believed that if anything happened to him, he would be safe with me.”

“Sorry, but Dumbledore’s sed I gotta take ‘im.”

Sirius finally got up off his knees, switching which arms was supporting Harry and dusting off his trousers. “I know a place that’s closer and is far safer than bringing in Petunia and her ilk. That’s going to be way more trouble than it’s worth in the long run.”

“I know yer ne’er one te follow the rules, Sirius, but ye really need te think this through, will ye?”

“Already have,” Sirius told him. “Have you thought this through though? It may not be easy with me, but if they come looking for Harry there, what chance do any of them have?”

“I think ye need to take it up with Dumbledore if ye don’t like it meself.”

As he heard Harry simmering down a little, Sirius found himself humming a soft lullaby, trying to convince him to sleep and pointedly ignored that line of questioning. It wouldn’t be long before the Muggles started waking up and starting their day, and this was very likely going to be just the scene he would not want to end up caught in.

“I’ll catch up with Dumbledore when I catch up with him. For now, I think we need to make some tracks,” Sirius said. “I’m sure he’ll understand. Just tell him that I’ve got him and he’s safe.”

He was likely the only safe one here if they stayed much longer.


	2. Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where do you go when there's nowhere left to turn to?

In the wake of Halloween, the best way that Remus Lupin could describe the whole ordeal was as a complete blur. He was still trying to shake off the full moon’s effects from the week before, James and Lily were _gone_ , Peter was _gone_ , Sirius had been accused of murder, He Who Must Not Be Named was defeated, people were getting arrested everywhere, and that left a lot of questions. Nobody knew who to trust.

It was all just a headache, and right now, all that Remus could think of in the wake of it all was that he should have let James and Sirius just kick Snape’s ass twice as hard back when they were in school because he was being just plain intolerable now.

Really, it was a bit of a surprise that Remus could pull himself out of bed at all these days. As if things hadn’t already been awful enough before.

Not even two weeks ago, it would be a relief to see Sirius at the door, as it would mean Sirius survived something he likely shouldn't have. In the moment, though, Remus just kind of stared at him through the screen door, his expression completely blank, not sure what to think about the situation.

“Can I come in?” Sirius asked.

“...You’re the one that pays the bills here,” Remus reminded him. “And even if you didn’t, how am I to stop you anyway?”

Sirius offered a grin and moved to bend down, then opened the door to cross the threshold with his less dominant hand, and it didn’t even take a full step inside before Remus was slowly taking a step backward.

“…Close the door behind you,” Remus said, glancing carefully at Sirius’ burden. “Sirius Black, are you out of your mind?”

Young Harry smiled wide at the sight of his favorite uncle, and Remus resisted the urge to just scoop him out of Sirius’ arms and whisk him away to dote on.

“I don’t think that this is the first time you accused me of that, but I do have a method to the madness, as usual.”

“I’m not asking about the method, I’m asking for the root this time,” Remus told him…and gave way to the urge to scoop up James’ mini-me. “You’re supposed to be detained right now.”

“Moony, I promise you,” Sirius told him. “I didn’t kill him.” He took a glance over to Harry. “But I may have kidnapped my godchild.”

Remus took a deep breath and sat down on the sofa, gently rocking his upper body to give Harry some much needed movement, losing his words for a good minute and sitting in silence. Sirius didn’t move from where he was standing. Remus couldn’t decide if he was trying to stand his ground or if some sort of prey drive remained and he was trying not to face Remus’ wrath.

“Lily’s sister hated her, remember?” Sirius pointed out. “Alice and Marlene are not options anymore, all Harry has is us. Turn your back on me if you feel the need to, but don’t turn your back on Harry, at least.”

“What kind of person do you take me for, Padfoot?” Remus countered. “I’m not the one turning my back on anyone, it’s you that turned your back on us.”

Sirius clenched his jaw, trying not to let his mouth get him in further trouble. His face, however, has never been good at hiding what he was thinking, and Remus could read his old friend like a book.

Just like every other time, Remus just sighed and leaned back into the sofa, resigned.

“You’ll be the one answering to Dumbledore.”

He blinked slowly, then relaxed with that normal grin of his, the one that Remus knew meant trouble, then started walking toward the sofa. “I’m sure that he’s figured it out by now.”


	3. Hindsight is 20/20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day of James and Lily Potter's funeral was the first time in days that Remus spoke to him since he came home. All that time has given Sirius some time to reflect on the situation.

Every evening at around the same time, a barn owl sat on the windowsill, and Harry would make noises to try to call it closer to him. Sirius could practically set his watch to it, provided he bothered wearing a watch to begin with.

Remus would take the letter tied to his leg, read it, then send the owl home empty handed. At first, Sirius was almost curious what those letters contained, but after the third evening, he just stopped asking questions. There was no need to question it when he recognized the owl as Mr. Lupin’s after all, and just the stress written on Remus’ face as he sank into his chair told him that it was best not to ask.

Once upon a time, Remus would have offered that information, but these days, it just seemed that Sirius would be asking too much of him to just ask him to lean on him.

It seemed to hit some sort of boiling point when Remus returned home one day, dressed in black and heading straight to the liquor cabinet, poured himself a tall glass of scotch, and just slumped down at the kitchen table, head in his arms, without even bothering to touch it.

Sirius frowned at the sight, of course, because he hated to see Remus suffering in any form. All it had done was solidified the thought that his distrust in him had been completely unfounded. With the true traitor at the forefront of his mind, it felt ridiculous that he even suspected him in the first place.

After he put Harry to bed in the makeshift crib in Remus’ office, Sirius began his nightly check for signs of a rat, finishing up with the kitchen, where he sat and watched Remus in silence for a while.

“It’s starting to get late,” Sirius told him.

“Just leave me alone,” Remus replied.

“I’ve left you alone all day, Moony,” he told him, trying to keep his voice gentle. “How was it, anyway?”

Remus stayed silent for a while before finally taking a drink of his scotch. “Awful. It was awful. I never wanted to see them that way…”

“None of us did,” Sirius told him. “But we knew what we were getting into when we signed up to the Order, you know. I don’t think that James would have preferred to go down any other way.”

Remus lifted his head, brown eyes focused on Sirius, his expression as blank as ever. “I think he’d’ve preferred going down without Lily coming with him. I know that’s what I would’ve wanted if I was given that situation.”

“Don’t talk like that,” Sirius told him. “You’d never be in that position to begin with. It’s over, he’s done.”

Remus sat up entirely, moving his eyes to his scotch to stare at the amber liquid for a while longer before he very simply sighed. “Then why do I feel like there’s no way that it’s over? There just isn’t any fucking way.”


	4. No Escape From Wizard Problems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus was used to taking jobs far underneath his credentials, and the Muggle World seemed so untouched that it felt like a good place to get away from his real problems, if only for however long he could hold a job. Unfortunately, he can't escape forever.

Shopping for things for Harry very quickly became one of Remus’ favorite distractions. Seeing the things that Harry liked and didn’t like somehow always surprised him, aside from the practice Snitch that Harry liked to watch flutter around and reach for. That wasn’t quite a surprise to either him or Sirius.

Aside from that, though, it felt like Harry was leaning toward the Muggle side of his preferred toys. Stacking rings, a boat for the bath that Sirius liked to enchant so that it went in circles around Harry like a motorboat, it was all amazing to watch.

That was probably what inspired Remus’s next job to be at a Muggle store that offered absolutely everything he could think of to help people prepare for their babies. The excitement that all these families had reminded him a good deal of Lily and James’ excited smiles.

It was a good reminder that life went on after everything, even if he felt like his own life stood still. The Muggle world remained so…untouched by everything.

That was probably why he was so surprised when he saw a prim and proper woman, a stuffed vulture adorning her head as she removed a mouse trap from her red purse to search for something.

“Mrs. Longbottom?” Remus asked, a bit incredulously as he stepped away from the registry desk.

“I’m sorry dear, do I know you?”

“I’m Remus. I went to school with Frank and Alice.”

“Oh, thank _goodness_ they are hiring some quality staff that can help me,” she said, loudly enough that Remus watched his manager stop in his heels to back off him before he could even get started about leaving the registry unattended. “Here, I have a list.”

She brandished the piece of parchment with perfect script, easily read, and Remus took it looking through. “Right this way, Mrs. Longbottom, I can show you some of the options.”

“What brings you working out here, anyway?” Mrs. Longbottom asked.

“The discount, mostly,” Remus replied. “I’m surprised to see you out here, too.”

“Well, I suppose it can’t be helped,” she replied. “Ever since Frank and Alice’s run-in, I’ve been taking care of little Neville, and he’s just not showing any magical potential.”

Remus winced in feigned sympathy. “I’m sorry. If it helps, some babies seem like they just prefer the way Muggles make their toys. Who knows, maybe he’ll be playing Gobstones before you know it.”

“Well, I suppose there’s a chance he’ll simply be a late bloomer, but this is absolutely terrifying! Look around, there are so many things here! And so overpriced to boot!”

“No, Mrs. Longbottom, this is in pounds, not galleons.”

“Well, they should make it more obvious.”

“It certainly would help some days, but I know how to convert it properly. Do you want me to do your shopping for you while you get to Diagon Alley to convert?”

“No, I brought this…” she waved her hand, a card in her hand. “… _thing_ at the suggestion of Griselda. Apparently, it will automatically convert everything when I go pay. Says some Muggleborns swear by it when they go to prepare for their NEWTs. How bizarre is that, Remus?”

Remus looked away, rubbing a temple while he pretended to look at the assortment of mattress covers. “Quite bizarre, Mrs. Longbottom.”


	5. Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius and Remus could only hide for so long when Remus was avoiding his father's letters, especially when his father knew where he lived.

It didn’t take long for the Ministry to find him, at least, that was Sirius’ perspective of things as he saw Lyall Lupin walking up the pathway. Quickly, he closed the curtains and groaned, and he was going to curse every damn letter that Remus hadn’t responded to. Of course Mr. Lupin was going to get worried and make an appearance, and there was just about bugger all he could do about it but hide.

It took a few minutes to be reminded by Remus that Lyall might be a member of the Ministry, but this was not his department, so his visit was a social one, and Remus was not afraid to open the door for him by time he made it up.

Lyall offered a smile to his son, and then gave a tense one to Sirius. “Good to see you’re in good health, Sirius.”

“You as well, Mr. Lupin,” Sirius replied. “Come on in. It’s a little cramped, but what do you expect?”

“Hi!” Harry piped up from where he was coloring…well, squiggling color around black and white pages, at least.

Lyall smiled and greeted the Boy Who Lived warmly, letting Remus lead him to the sofa. “I think it’s just fine for now. Sirius, does the Ministry know that you’re here?”

“I’m not exactly hiding,” Sirius countered. “I have nothing to hide in the first place.”

“Then why did you run away after your arrest, Sirius?”

“…I think I’m going to put the kettle on,” Remus told them both and quickly took his exit, only stopping to pick Harry up along the way. Not that Sirius blamed him, of course; this had to be a terrible thing to be in the middle of.

Still, Sirius wasn’t afraid of Lyall. He’d always been a good man; he’d see reason easily. “I ran away because I was getting arrested for somebody else’s crimes, most people don’t want to serve another man’s time.”

Lyall looked the way he always had, calm and collected, just as sharply alert as his son, but he did drop his voice so that his son’s much sharper ears couldn’t pick up on his voice. “Sirius, you’re making a big mistake.”

Sirius followed suit, leaning forward in his chair to make it easier for them to discuss this. “I haven’t killed anybody, Mr. Lupin, the Ministry can try to say I did all they want, but you’ve got the wrong guy.”

“Even so, Sirius, I have to watch out for Remus. He’s been through more than enough in this life, and you are just going to drag him into this mess if they find out that you are here, don’t you think?”

“When I came here, Remus had the option to say no if he chose to, and he chose to let me in anyway, that’s all I need to know about the situation.”

“Sirius, I am not going to let you drag my son’s name through the mud alongside yours. Just stop hiding, turn yourself in, and we’ll all very simply be done with this matter without any further repercussions. If you won’t do it to clear your own name, at least consider doing it for what might be the only person in this country who is still on your side.”

Sirius pulled a face, crossing his arms and picking at a stud in his leather jacket. “If I go to Azkaban, then your son is alone and let me tell you, he’s been all out of sorts lately. Is that what you want?”

“Don’t twist my words around, Sirius, and don’t you ever think that Remus has to face anything alone again, with or without you. If you’ve nothing to hide, turn yourself in before this looks bad for the both of you.”

By time Remus returned with tea mugs, the two had fallen back and into comfortable silence.


	6. Waking Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If sometimes dreams come true, what does it say about you when your nightmares already have come to pass?

At some point, Remus had to have stopped to consider if he was doing the right thing. He wanted to keep a low profile, but here he was, harboring a criminal. Not just any criminal, mind you, but the man who laid claim on the lives of everyone else.

Still, he supposed, there were many things not lining up with that story. Should Sirius have truly been willing to betray them, Remus would have imagined that he would have taken advantage of the fact he and Harry were both under this roof and ended this horrible nightmare that Remus felt there was just no escape from.

After all, if it wasn’t the haunting golden eyes over a blood soaked crib that kept Remus up at night, it was the idea that at any moment, there could be a flash of green and nothing more that left Remus staring at the ceiling all night long.

The news that justice has caught up with Bellatrix and Ruldophus did little to comfort him, even if Sirius had been practically dancing with excitement when the news had reached them. It was likely yet another point in the books that Sirius had been somehow involved, and Remus had thought about this fact long and hard all day.

The truth was that Remus had no idea what the truth truly was, and he couldn’t fall asleep with that man in the house until he knew the truth, beside him or otherwise.

Tossing the covers off his body, Remus tiptoed out into the main hallway, then held his breath as he opened his office door, clenching his eyes tight just in case he didn’t want to see what he was about to see.

When he saw Harry, sprawled out and asleep without a care in the world, he finally allowed himself to breathe, moving toward the young boy to pull the covers back up to his shoulders from where he had tossed them, then he sank to his knees against the crib to lean against it.

He selected a side wall on purpose. It made it easier to keep watch of the window and the door without daring to be so overconfident that he would hear them open or see the shadows move.

For a while, he dared not move except to gnaw a little on the scarred tissue near his lip. He heard that with time, the scars should become less noticeable, but at this point, he had no idea how true that was or wasn’t and he didn’t quite care.

It was the door that moved that night, and Sirius moved silently to keep Harry asleep.

One warning growl was all he was getting, guttural and feral from some part of his mind that Remus had no idea how to access on his own. He’s tried, after all, he knew that Fenrir was correct when he called him nothing but an obedient dog on that night that was far too recent in his mind.

Sirius stared for a while, then closed the door behind him, sinking down to sit by it, keeping his eyes on Remus.

“…Can’t sleep either, can you?” Sirius asked quietly, but with how the silence in the room felt, he might as well be shouting in the Common Room.

“…No,” Remus told him honestly.

Those were the only words that passed that night, Sirius watching the moon creep across the sky, and Remus watching his every move until the sun took its place.


	7. A Change in Appearance

Sirius pulled his hair back, staring at the mirror in the bathroom. He knew this was likely a rash decision brought on from starting to go stir crazy – Sirius was NOT built for hiding inside and not doing anything, after all – but this weird decision actually had a bit of thought behind it. After all, the fastest way to alter your appearance was to change your hair.

Or he could wander around outside as a dog, but this way it would make people at least second guess his human form, too. He just needed to get the nerve to do it. How short was too short, after all? He supposed that he could work his way up until he made his decision…

It was a little sad. All those years growing it out, all those years of pride in his hair, and he was just about to throw it all out the window. He was very attached to his hair, and it was definitely a defining feature of his, which meant that it just...had to go.

With a deep breath, he closed the scissors in his hand and brought the blades down on to a chunk, just below his shoulders. He let it linger for a bit, holding what fell in his hand while he checked the mirror to decide if he looked different enough.

After deciding that he’d just have to take some extra time to style it properly in the end, he took another piece and did the same, evening out the other side. This was…kind of therapeutic in a way. Sirius could easily understand why women tended to go straight for messing up their hair when he needed a distraction from something.

When he was done, he threw his head under the bathtub’s faucet and wet it, taking a moment to tap his wand against his head to get it evened out and properly styled before considering what to do with the two feet of hair that were now on the floor. Throwing them out? A Polyjuice Potion would be enough to take his sacrifice and render it useless.

Remus wandered in, scrunching his nose up at the smell of burning hair from the fireplace. “Sirius, why does it smell like burning hair in here?”

“Gave myself a haircut,” Sirius told him from the kitchen.

Remus followed his voice to the kitchen, then lifted his eyebrows for a second before pushing his lips into a tight line with his face turning a little red and walking back into the living room.

Sirius knew that look anywhere, and just to fluster him a little further, he trailed after Remus and called out to him. “Come on Moony, tell me what you think!”

Remus picked Harry up and bounced him a little. “Did you even recognize your godfather when he decided to make this silly decision, Harry?”

“You could have just said that you hated it, you know,” Sirius countered, bending down to Harry’s level to stick his tongue out and make a face.

Harry laughed, reached out to grab a fistful and pull.

“Harry!” Remus chastised, stepping backward to give Sirius a little bit of a break.

“Don’t be mad,” Sirius countered. “That’s most action I’ve gotten in months.”

"It suits you," Remus told him. "A bit edgy for me, but it suits you just fine."


	8. Questioning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Narcoleptic Argentinian once weighed in that jealousy, anger, and betrayal would drive a man mad, and without trust, there can be no love.
> 
> Remus receives his summons to Wizengamot to come in for questioning, and it turns out that the high wizarding court aren't the only people with questions lingering.

The owl that Harry was trying to call to him was not the usual one, and that was more than enough to put Remus on edge until he got close enough to recognize the pattern of it. Sirius seemed to recognize it as well, because he was on his feet the minute that Remus undid the ribbon and broke the seal.

“Owl!” Harry told them both.

“Yes, Harry, it’s an owl,” Sirius replied idly. “Isn’t he a looker, too?”

“It’s a Great Horned Owl,” Remus added. “Can you say that so far?”

“Grey horn owl!” Harry cried in response, moving over to the window.

“Be easy with it,” Sirius told him, hand reaching up to the parchment to grab Remus’ hand and dropping his voice. “Talk in the kitchen?”

Remus nodded. “We’ll be right back, Harry, why don’t you show the ‘gre _at_ horn owl’ to the stand?” He made sure to point at the stand so that Harry knew where to go on their way to the kitchen, where he put the letter down on the countertop.

“It had to have been your father,” Sirius pointed out. “Nobody else knows that you’re connected to me at all these days.”

“But it’s not exactly a secret to anyone at the Order that we were together before,” Remus pointed out. “It could have been anyone really.”

“What if Peter’s told them?”

“Don’t start with me, Sirius, Peter’s _dead_ , remember?”

“I told you before that I didn’t kill him, maybe they caught up with him.”

“Then why am I being summoned into questioning by Wizengamot to answer to your whereabouts?” Remus countered.

“If you truly believed I was the traitor I’d never have been able to stay this long,” Sirius shot back. “You never keep your enemies close, it’s beyond you to even be able to keep a poker face on and pretend you like somebody, don’t you remember what happened here?”

Remus recoiled slightly from Sirius’ hand, which had settled on his jawline, his thumb tracing the fresher set of scars across his face. The motion was gentle, as if Sirius was considering them himself.

“You’re right,” Remus told him. “But I’ve never been friends with Greyback, and certainly nothing more, despite anything you think you may have seen that night.”

“I admit that I was confused before, but time’s given me the ability to realize that was a beast that was going to send you back to the Order the most graphic example he could make of you if we hadn’t intervened.”

“Sirius, be _very_ careful about what you are calling a beast when it’s somebody with the exact same condition I have. I may find myself less inclined to lie for you out of my own loyalties.”

“You know I wasn’t referring to _that_ ,” Sirius countered. “But certainly we can agree everything about Greyback is either beastly or monstrous, and it has nothing to do with his condition.”

Remus sighed, hoisting himself on to the counter so that he could sit down. This was entirely too much.

“What are we going to do?”


	9. Devils Don't Fly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But God, we almost had it all.
> 
> Full Moon, November 1981. Sirius knew better than anybody that life just wasn't fair sometimes, and the hardest decisions seemed to fall on his shoulders most often out of the former Marauders.

Sirius spent a lot more time with Harry that day. He laid on the floor, telling him stories and showing Harry how to stay within the lines. He let Harry ride on his back, showed him the right technique on how to let the wings of a snitch slide between your fingers so that it guided the ball into your palm easily, the way that James had shown him more than once and swore up and down worked like a charm every time.

Remus had called off work again and was told not to worry about coming back in if he took the few days that were slated for his questioning off as well. They had all their meals together, and it gave him all the time Sirius needed to study all the differences that these last few years made.

It was the first time he realized just how few and far between his smiles were, not that Moony was ever one to simply smile because he got up this morning, but even in the relative term, and they were all caused by Harry, who would take far too long to realize just how exhausted Remus must be.

Everyone asked so much of him these few years, and Sirius knew that he was no exception. After all, Lyall was probably correct. He stuck around far too long for this to have gone any other way, and the damage had already been done anyway.

After he closed the door and made sure that it stayed locked until morning, he gave one last look to Remus, already working on tying his legs together to the foot of the bed in preparation for the moon’s light to hit him.

Sirius double checked his knots, then moved to tie his wrists together before he finally spoke.

“Will you be okay by yourself?”

“Of course. I’ve done this countless times alone before you, and if you’ve told me the truth, what’s one night?”

“Is that an invitation to come back then?”

“Only if you swear never to keep anything from me again.”

“You’ve got your own secrets, Moony,” Sirius tightened the rope as much as he dared, then looped the next one around Remus’ neck. “That isn’t fair.”

Then again, neither was tying Remus up like an animal to suffer on his own tonight, but Sirius knew that Remus had made up his mind.

“Nothing in life is, is it?”

Sirius tied the other end of the rope through the slots of the bed frame. “I suppose not. If it were I’d still have you in love with me enough that you don’t second guess everything.”

“That was a risk you took long before last month, Padfoot.” He sighed softly. “But I don’t suppose that it’s insurmountable.”

Sirius offered him a soft smile before leaning over to kiss the top of his head. “Talk like that when I’m facing down Azkaban and you’re looking like this won’t end well for you, you know. Look out for Harry until I get back. Take care of yourself, too.”

Remus stayed silent until Sirius was almost to the bedroom door, and Sirius almost missed it.

“Don’t be too long, please.”

Sirius looked over his shoulder with a smile, closing the door behind him and locking it tight before he took a deep breath and walked out the front door, on his way to the rendezvous point with Moody.

This was the only option left, wasn’t it?


	10. The Wrong Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus was a smart man, but he's not lived enough life to become a wise one. Thankfully, he knows the difference and he seeks counsel from the wisest man he's ever known.

Remus, above all else, took pride in his own intelligence. This was by no means a fatal flaw, of course, but when it wasn’t his mind that he had to listen to, it made his own life a lot more difficult to get through.

That, of course, was where his basic instincts came into play. His instincts were nothing to sneeze at either, mostly because he was well in tune with what the beast underneath his skin tended to need.

But his mind and his gut were in a constant war, caught in between evidence and wanting to believe in somebody he knew for years and had yet to lie about something this big, struggling to keep above water with the fact there were _witnesses_ , but Remus had gotten so used to Sirius’ presence and touch that he couldn’t imagine any other life for himself. If Sirius had betrayed James and Lily, though, what hope did Remus have for himself and Harry? Honestly, the world could collapse around Remus and he’d be fine with it, but Harry deserved an entire one for himself, one where he wasn’t burdened by all the things they’ve all done in the securing that world, and Remus truly didn’t think he was the one to keep the weight off Harry’s shoulders, but Sirius was absolutely correct: if Death Eaters showed up at Petunia’s door, what chance did she and her family have to fight them off? At least Remus had a chance, no matter what ghost of one it was, it was better than damning innocent lives to the same fate so many of Remus’ friends fell to.

When all else failed, he felt no shame in seeking the time and energy of somebody else to help him through difficult times. In this case, it was having his old headmaster in.

Dumbledore was sitting with young Harry in his lap, and Remus knew that the older wizard had a very good idea how Remus ended up in this situation before the kettle was even off the stove. It couldn’t help but remind him of a time that Remus was so alone, before his friends, before Hogwarts.

“It’s strange,” Dumbledore told him. “The timing of it all. You get called into questioning and days later Alastor catches up with Sirius.”

“I suppose,” Remus replied, taking a seat across from him in the tiny living room.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you what you might know about this situation in the first place. I know you’ve your bias, but I trust you’re the only person that can make the proper judgment call.”

“Nobody likes to think about a friend would turn on the others, one by one. I just don’t see any other explanation for what occurred.”

“They don’t,” Dumbledore replied, “but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t happen every day. It’s a pain that is all too familiar for most of us, and I’m afraid that it will only get worse for a while.”

“I don’t believe anybody is incapable of anything provided the right motivation,” Remus told him, keeping his voice perfectly even. “What I’m having trouble believing is that there is a motivation in this world that is strong enough for Sirius to turn his back on James.”

There truly was not any reason that Remus could come up with that would create a situation where Sirius would have allowed the events of Halloween to happen the way that it had gone. Remus had spent the last month or so trying to find answers, any answer might do, but the fact remained that he had come up with nothing.

“You know, Remus,” Dumbledore told him. “Perhaps you cannot find an answer because the answer is very simply not present. Or perhaps, you are looking for the wrong thing.”


	11. Interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius Black picked the right Auror, who knows how to ask the right questions, but does not know how he can back Sirius' story when so many mistakes were made on Halloween night.

When it came to catching criminals, Alastor Moody was one of the best. This was not a secret to any of the Order of the Phoenix, especially since he had done so well to fight alongside them. Sirius could not think of a better man to earn the price on his head, especially since he knew that the first thing out of his mouth was going to be a demand for an explanation.

In that regard, Moody very simply didn’t disappoint, even if that meant that they were sitting at his office with the more experienced Auror using one large hand to press on both of his temples.

“Why didn’t you just tell somebody in the first place?”

“Well,” Sirius said, “I told Remus, but by time I got to him the news had already spread and he thought he knew the real story, and, well, you know Remus.”

“Not what I’m talking about and you know it,” Moody snapped. “If you would have brought this to our attention instead of chasing that rat on your own, ONE of us could have helped you. Instead, you went off on your own and put Pettigrew in a corner.”

“He sold my best friends out like they were lambs to the slaughter, what was I supposed to do?” Sirius barked back. “Spend hours trying to explain the situation and let him use that time to get away?!”

“ _Or_ you could have Apparated back at Headquarters and got me to at least back you up, if you just told me there was no time to explain, I would have never questioned it! That way you’d at least have a credible witness and probably somebody who could catch a rat.” To accentuate his point, he pointed to his fake eye. “Do you think this thing is just for cosmetics, Black? I know everything was nothing short of crazy that night, but the last thing anyone needs is for an Auror with great potential to just carry out vigilante justice in front of anyone, much less where somebody could catch you using magic.”

“Maybe I should just kill him next time,” Sirius said, rolling his eyes. “Clearly that’s the only language people like him speak.”

“Black, now is not the time to make threats that I _know_ you’re more than capable of carrying out, that’s intent.”

“You mind telling me _how_ I can have intent when the man is already dead as far as anyone is concerned?”

“If you can convince half the court that he’s _not_ dead, then they’ll agree that it’s intent. Unless you want to go serve your time in Azakaban for his murder first and THEN get out to do it, then fine, by all means, show your intent, but when you add twelve counts of voluntary manslaughter and an unauthorized use of magic charge, that might be pushing the envelope just a little bit.”

“Unauthorized use of magic I can take, but those are not _my_ victims, they’re Peter’s.”

“I’m not the one you have to prove it to, and I certainly couldn’t care less when there’s a Death Eater going to go free.”

“Can’t you just go find him?”

“Sure,” Moody told him. “I’ll get on with examining every rat in the British Isles, it should only take a couple days, should be done before you're taken to trial.”

Sirius lifted an eyebrow, then slouched in his seat. “Fair point I suppose.”


	12. 4 Privet Drive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People grieve in different ways. That has never been a shock to Remus, but empathy almost always was the key.

What was supposed to be a quick visit to Arabella Figg to let Harry play with the kittens (and perhaps pick out one for himself, because if Sirius was correct, it would certainly be worth the investment) ended up getting a bit of a detour when Remus noticed a blonde head craning her neck to peer over the fence.

Remus supposed that Petunia must have seen the remains of the Floo Powder as it made its way up the chimney, and he was certain that it would be rude to not at least come say hello with Harry in tow, so that was precisely what he did.

Petunia must have noticed him on his way over, because she was busily watering her picture-perfect garden. Remus forced back the laugh, because he knew Lily too well to have bought if for a second.

“Petunia Evans?” Remus asked.

“Dursley,” Petunia corrected, very pointedly not looking at Remus’ face. “Do I know you from somewhere?”

“Yes, we met at Lily’s funeral,” Remus said. “I was looking for a cat breeder and thought that you wouldn’t mind seeing Harry before we headed home.”

Petunia glanced over to the toddler in his arms and then slightly over Remus’ head. “What are you doing with Harry?”

“Well,” Remus said with a shrug. “I suppose for now that I’m his guardian. How are you holding up, Petunia?”

“Fine,” Petunia said rather too quickly for Remus to ever believe her. “I’m fine.”

“You know,” Remus told her, “if you’re ever _not_ fine…well, I suppose that we’re family now.”

Petunia put her gardening can down and moved a bit closer so they could talk a little easier without being overheard, pointedly keeping her gaze on her nephew. “I’m not sure what she told you, but I’ve a perfectly normal life now, and I’d be more than happy to keep it that way.”

“You know better than anyone that nothing is ever perfectly normal,” Remus reminded her, just as quietly. “But what I can promise is that we can stay out of your way as much as you’d like. The offer still stands, though, if you ever miss her too terribly, I will be more than happy to bring Harry over so we can talk about her. It’s our memories that keep her alive, right?”

“I don’t want to think about her any more than I have to,” Petunia admitted. “I want her to stay in the past so I can move on with my own life.”

“I understand that. I’m trying to find ways to move along myself.” Remus sighed softly. “Not so easy, is it?”

“With her, it’s never been easy.”

“I honestly wish I couldn't say that for James, but he’s always been…less-than-easy himself.”

Petunia thought for a minute, then turned on her heel. “We’ve spoken enough outside, the neighbors are going to think if I don’t invite you in. Would you like a glass of lemonade or something?”

Remus smiled, seeing through everything. “If your husband won’t mind.”

“Well looking at you, I’m sure he’ll know that there’s nothing to worry about.”

Remus shook his head and started to follow her inside. “Hopefully someday we’ll know each other well enough I’ll figure out what that’s supposed to mean.”


	13. Reminisce

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius had always been one to live in the moment, but in his circumstances, all he can do is think of how things used to be.
> 
> Moody, naturally, is not having any of this when there are important matters in the now.

Sirius had barely dozed off before he heard the loud thud of books hitting wood nearby, and for a second, he was just a few years younger and afraid if he opened up his eyes, he’d be back in the Common Room with Remus staring him down, mouth ready for a lecture about stretching himself through the entire length of the sofa again. Funny how if that were the case Sirius probably would let it happen, laughing to himself because this has far too long a horrible nightmare and what a relief it’d be to just wake up and go hug James tightly before the next Quidditch match and tell him all about it.

Unfortunately, when he opened his eyes, it was just Mad-Eye by his desk with one overly large tome, flipping through it with the expertise that only came from years of experience searching through it.

“D’ya mind?” Sirius slurred a bit, sitting back up.

“Your cousin-in-law just got off,” Moody told him.

“…Wait, Lestrange got off?”

“Not Lestrange, Malfoy,” Moody corrected. “There’s been an uprising in Death Eaters using the Imperius defense and it actually _working_. Figure we can give it a shot if you decide you’re gonna get your hands dirty in this case.”

“Any of you lot find the other Death Eater in the family?” Sirius said.

Moody tilted his head back and forth a bit. “Yes and no. Stopped by your old house for some questioning and the house-elf told us he’s gone.”

“…I hope by gone Kreacher meant he’s run off,” Sirius said, already aware of how stupid that sounded. After all, if he was running, he’d have taken Kreacher with him. “Regulus you fucking idiot.”

It wasn’t like he didn’t see it coming, though, Regulus was too soft for that crowd, he probably didn’t even realize what he was in until he was too far in to get out alive anyway.

“Get your name cleared and I’ll hand that assignment over to you if you want it,” Moody said. “But first, you need your name cleared. Figured he’d be the best character witness we could get that you’d never work with Voldemort, seeing as you two were pretty close in age.”

“We could always bring Remus in,” Sirius mused. “I’d rather it not come to that, if you poke and prod him with the wrong question then everybody’s gonna know about a problem that the five of us have been trying to protect from getting out in all this.”

“Then why are you even suggesting it?” Moody pointed out. “Besides, you _do_ remember who it was that threw the first accusation out that you were the spy, right?”

“He only did that because I accused him first,” Sirius dismissed. “He’s just far better at making arguments than I am at any given moment. Always has been, he’s also a damn good liar, that’s part of why I accused him in the first place.”

Moody waved his hand. “I’m your bailor, not your marriage counselor…partnership counselor? Whatever, I don’t need the full backstory for something that I remember distinctly you both agree is over.”

“Certainly doesn’t feel like it sometimes,” Sirius replied. “I think Remus is thinking of wiping the slate clean for Harry’s sake, and we certainly never had the official breakup.”

“Good for you, now will you let me read this damned record so I can see how the hell they are getting away with this Imperius defense and we can fake it with you?”

“Sorry,” Sirius said. “Just been a lot to process the past couple months.”

“Then let’s get this out of the way so we can catch up to the rat, shall we?”


	14. Godric's Hollow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius may be stuck, but Remus was free to move as he pleased, and if he was looking for the wrong answer, what better way than to retrace steps?

It felt natural to Remus that the first place to check for the truth was where this had all started. Godric’s Hollow, of course, was the last place he wanted to be, he couldn’t even begin to think of it the same way anymore, but somewhere on these streets had to have been something that might prove Sirius’ innocence, or at least point them in the right direction.

Things had obviously been cleaned up a lot since that night, Prongs’ house was almost rebuilt when he passed by and it was hard to tell where, exactly, Sirius had gotten to before he confronted Peter.

He held on to Harry just a little bit tighter as he walked away from his first home, and he might have imagined it, but he thought he felt Harry clinging back.

“You alright, Harry?”

“Home please,” Harry muttered into his shoulder.

“I know. I’m sorry, I wish I could have found a babysitter for you.” He sighed. “Prongs – your dad, I mean, we used to call him Prongs the way your godfather calls me Moony when he is trying to butter me up – he’d want us to just put our fears to the side and get down to the truth.”

Remus felt his nose twitch, almost on his own. It was faint, of course, England was famous for its rain, but he knew what he was working with.

“I think we found the place, Harry.”

Harry lifted his head to look around. It was just an alleyway, after all.

“Whatever happened, at least we know Peter didn’t get very far.” Remus sniffed around again, trying to follow a trail, then cursed when he realized he just backtracked to the Potter house.

“...You don’t really wanna go in there, do you, Harry?”

Harry sighed softly, leaning back on his shoulder again. It was way past bedtime, Remus was so thankful that Harry was just an angel who didn’t throw tantrums that much.

“You’re right, I suppose we don’t have a choice,” Remus told him, making sure that nobody on the street was paying attention before tapping his wand against the lock on the front door and stepping inside.

It was eerie how untouched the ground floor looked. He tried not to think too much about what the hell that could possibly mean. Voldemort came in here with a purpose, and there was no struggle here? Unless he took the side door in the kitchen, that made no sense at all.

Carefully, he lay Harry on the couch and threw his coat over the tiny body. “Go ahead and take a nap, by time you wake up, we’ll be at home, I promise. If you get scared at all, just call for me and I’ll be right here as fast as I can, okay?”

“Okay,” Harry repeated as Remus tucked him in. “Night night, Rems.”

“Goodnight, Harry,” Remus told him before heading to the kitchen to looked around. That was a bit more of a mess than the living room, glasses were missing, as was the handle off Sirius’ usual mug, still in the sink. He supposed that this _was_ a crime scene, they wanted to keep it as the same as possible after the initial cleanup.

Why was the butcher knife missing from Lily’s knife block? That didn’t seem right. James wouldn’t have been _that_ insane. Sirius, for sure, Remus would in a pinch. Voldemort naturally wouldn’t need it.

Carefully, he started to move from the kitchen door and wrapped around the kitchen, moving back toward the stairs.

The second he saw the splintered pieces of mahogany on the fourth step, perfectly innocent if you didn’t know what you were looking at, Remus just turned around, scooped Harry up, and Disapperated back to their cottage, not wanting to even think about it. He’d try again when he was a bit mentally stronger.

The pieces of James' wand were placed in a box, gathered together, and put on the mantle to remind Remus to pick up where he left off and not run away next time.


	15. Visiting Hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius has a visitor. A visitor who also has a plan.

“I spoke with Remus.”

Sirius couldn’t help but feel a little bit ashamed hearing Dumbledore say those words. It never, ever ended well for anybody to hear those words out of the Headmaster’s mouth. Mentally, he braced himself.

“So, what did he say?”

“Harry is doing quite well,” Dumbledore told him. “I’m just afraid to tell you that I’ve taken his first dance from you. I know that was something you were hoping to be involved in.”

He shook his head, exhaling slightly. “It’s…fine. If I don’t figure out how to prove that I didn’t do this, I’m going to miss a whole lot more that I always expected to be involved with.”

“Sirius, you’ve always been loyal to an absolute fault. It’s not always led you to make your best decisions. After Alastor reported back to me, it didn’t surprise me remotely that you chased after Peter seeking revenge for a fatal and tragic sleight to James and Lily.”

“That’s a relief, at least…”

“With that being said,” Dumbledore continued, “that is also going to make it easily believable that you have once again thrown yourself into a situation where you _have_ been enraged and didn’t care who was in your way.”

Moody called over from his desk. “Hey, Dumbledore, for what it’s worth?”

Dumbledore and Sirius both turned their heads to look at the Auror, still scrutinizing the log.

“If Sirius was one to actually kill in a surge of emotion, don’t you think we’d be down one less alpha werewolf in the highlands after Lupin’s discovery?”

Dumbledore was quiet for a second, but by time Sirius went to open his mouth, Dumbledore spoke again. “If my memory serves, it had been James that slung the first spell and pursued Greyback, Sirius had been too busy at the time. Sirius?”

“Of course he shot first,” Sirius countered. “We had to get him off him, Remus wasn’t moving and there was blood everywhere, James just saw _red_ and he just shot off after him like a deer, I’ve never seen him so mad.”

“And you stayed by Lily and Remus’ sides, of course.”

“Somebody had to protect them,” Sirius pointed out. “Enemy territory and all.”

“Well, that confirms my memory isn’t going yet,” Dumbledore told him. “So I don’t think that will be the best defense we can think of.”

“We were considering the Imperius defense,” Moody replied. “Malfoy just used it successfully and I think that it’s the best explanation for how Sirius reached a point to turn his back on James.”

“That’s going to decimate my chances on bringing Peter in when I get back in the game,” Sirius pointed out. “I need to leave James and Lily out of this.”

“They _will_ come up,” Moody countered. “There’s no way out of that and you’re going to have to fight guilt by association. I expect them to bring up every sore memory you ever had with James and Peter and you can’t lose your cool at them.”

“I’m not going to hide that I hate Peter,” Sirius told him. “You can bet that everyone will leave the hearing knowing that I want him dead and I didn’t get the satisfaction.”

“So,” Dumbledore concluded. “You’re finding the absolute truth to be your best defense?”

Sirius’s eyes widened a little bit as he caught on. “…I suppose I am.”


	16. Wolves And Snakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's somebody that Remus knows for certain can shed some light on this situation. It's just unfortunate that it has to be Snivellus.

He doubted he could count how many times that he’s been in this office. At least it looked so much brighter with Slughorn out of the way.

Of course, it wasn’t like the new potions master was much better as he sat at his desk for the first time. Remus held his hands up to show his lack of wand as he crossed the threshold, but that still did nothing for the glare and sour look on his face.

“This better be good.”

“Congratulations on your new position, Severus,” Remus told him.

It felt like Snape was swirling the words around his mind like a fine wine, gauging the sincerity. “Thank you, I suppose. I don’t suppose you’ve heard from Black.”

“Not since September,” he replied. “Can I sit down now?”

“Stay by the door and keep your hands where I can see them.” Remus took advantage of that meaning to put his arms down. “I half-expected him to show his teeth at the funeral.”

“I would think that he had his hands full at the time,” Remus replied. “I…have a question for you, and you don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to, Severus, I know that you’re trying to stay under the radar, but I need to know.”

“Make it quick, I have a lesson plan to make and we’re already well into the first term.”

“Was Pete with you?”

Severus arched an eyebrow. “I must be hard of hearing these days. Did you just ask me if Pettigrew was with me?”

“Yes.”

“Define ‘with me.’”

Remus threw his arms up, taking a step back and a deep breath. “Severus, I have _no_ time for word games and neither do you.”

“Then I suggest you make a relatively _short_ definition, Lupin.”

Remus shook his head, trying to bite his tongue. It was hard not to tell him this sort of petty inaction was _precisely_ why Lily would have never loved him, that it was pathetic to watch him try for so long only to fall away with a slip of the tongue. No. He needed answers, so he needed to play by Snivellus’ rules.

“In service.”

“’In service,’” Severus drawled, crossing his arms and looking up. A good sign, really, that meant he was thinking about giving an answer. “I cannot say that Pettigrew’s views on what was important properly aligned with mine. Then again, I cannot say Black’s ever would either. Make of that what you will.”

Remus wanted to tear his hair out, wanted to scream. He should have bit him, should have ripped out his throat and left him to die.

No, he was better than that, and he certainly knew that Severus knew how to penetrate somebody’s thoughts, so he quickly stilled them, exhaling the rage out of his nose.

“It’s a simple question, Severus. I don’t know how you slithered yourself to safety, but I can promise you that if I don’t get an answer you are going to _wish_ James was alive to torment you and it was me who died in his place.”

“Don’t threaten me, Lupin, you have _no_ idea what kind of mood I’m in and I would love to put you back in your place in front of your own House.”

“A direct answer, Severus, that’s all it will take to get me to leave! Pete or Sirius, which one was on your side?”

“Neither,” Severus snapped back, standing up from his desk, fast approaching Remus, who stood his ground. “Do you _truly_ think so low of me that I would be on a side that would destroy Lily, Lupin? I don’t care which of your little friends did it, Lily is _gone_ and you trying to play detective is getting your ex nowhere.”

“Forgive me for saying this, Severus, but I think not a single one of us would be surprised if one day you decided if you can’t have Lily, no one else can, and it took her carrying James’s son for you to let it sink in _you’ve lost, Severus_.”

“Get out of my office,” Severus replied, cool on the outside, but Remus could see the rage under the surface as he turned on his heel and headed to his desk. “And don’t shed on the way out.”

“I’m going,” Remus said, reaching for the door handle, “but know that whichever one of them did it is _precisely_ why no one can have Lily now. Lot of good your little plan to keep her protected did for her if you are going to protect her murderer.”

The door slammed loud enough that the stone echoed around him as Severus sank back into his chair, no longer in the mood to get a lesson plan done. If Remus Lupin ever stepped foot on these grounds again, he would destroy that man’s whole damn career before it can even take off.


End file.
